Sometimes we "have it, sometimes we don't". Sometimes we "feel" close to GOD, sometimes HE'S no where to be found. We try to "obey" HIM, even when we really don't want to. Reluctantly "following" implies that there is some sort of pressure, fear or coherenceing making us do it. Is this the time we are not close to HIM? Maybe obeying is more than just doing; Maybe it is AGREEING WITH AND "LOVING THE LOVE" where we "WILLFULLY AND JOYFULLY" FOLLOW. Are theses the times "we feel CLOSE TO HIM"? Philippians 2:21, "For they all seek their own interests, not those of JESUS CHRIST". MAYBE IN ORDER TO OBEY, WE MUST AGREE WITH GOD.
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The writer for our daily devotionals wishes to remain anonymous in regard to his work, giving instead Glory to the Author.